Married at First Sight expert Mel Schilling remembered as ‘amazing’ and ‘radiant’ after bowel cancer death

Source: Radio New Zealand

Mel Schilling emerged as one of Australia’s most recognisable relationship experts on Australian (and New Zealand) television.

On Tuesday, she died of bowel cancer at the age of 54.

As a judge on the hit reality show Married At First Sight Australia (MAFS), she was known for her sharp insight and a lack of tolerance for poor behaviour.

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Away from the spotlight, she was a devoted wife and mother.

Where did Schilling’s career begin?

Schilling, who held a Bachelor of Arts in Psychology and a Graduate Diploma in Psychology, had been a practising psychologist for more than 20 years.

She began her career in 1998 as a consulting psychologist at Morgan and Banks, then moved into a senior role with Personnel Decisions International in 2001, later working as a consulting psychologist with Extraversion Consulting.

She first joined Married At First Sight Australia in 2016 for its second season, alongside John Aiken and Trisha Stratford, who was later replaced by Alessandra Rampolla.

Following her success in Australia, she was appointed an expert on the UK edition in 2021, joining Paul C Brunson and Charlene Douglas.

How has Schilling’s family remembered the star?

Schilling married Gareth Brisbane in 2018.

Brisbane, who has a PhD in Computer Security, is a development leader at Mercer Australia and highly accomplished in his field.

The couple met on the dating site eHarmony, and eight years later, they tied the knot in Bali.

Schilling became a mother later in life at 42, and her husband celebrated her on Instagram, writing: “This is a woman who became a new mum and a TV star at 42 — and nailed both.”

When was Schilling diagnosed with her illness?

The 54-year-old was first diagnosed with colon cancer in December 2023.

Bowel cancer, encompassing both colon and rectal cancers, is among the most prevalent cancers in Australia and New Zealand.

Bowel cancer ranks as the fourth most common cancer in Australia, with about 15,500 new cases diagnosed each year, according to the Cancer Council.

While it is more prevalent in those over 50, it can develop at any age.

Although it primarily affects older adults, recent Cancer Council data indicate it has become the leading cause of cancer-related deaths in Australians aged 25 to 44.

Schilling shared with her social media followers that surgery had removed a 5-centimetre tumour and that she initially received the all clear.

However, a routine scan in late February 2024 revealed small nodules in her lungs, showing the cancer had metastasised. Over the past two years, Schilling went through 16 rounds of chemotherapy.

“I was later told I was eligible for a groundbreaking clinical trial specific to my gene type, due to start in March 2026,” she wrote.

Tragically, over Christmas 2025, she started to experience “blinding headaches” and was told the cancer had spread to the left side of her brain. This time, the cancer was diagnosed as terminal.

“Despite subsequent radiotherapy sessions, my oncology team have now told me there is nothing further they can do,” Shilling shared.

What are the symptoms of bowel cancer?

Not all bowel cancers show symptoms, the Cancer Council says.

But also, if you have these symptoms, it does not necessarily mean you have bowel cancer. The Cancer Council says you should see your doctor if you notice the following:

bleeding from the back passage or any sign of blood after a bowel motion
a change in usual bowel habit, such as straining (constipation) to go to the toilet or loose motions (diarrhoea)
abdominal pain or bloating
weight loss for no obvious reason, or loss of appetite
symptoms of anaemia, including unexplained tiredness, weakness or breathlessness

What tributes have been made in Schilling’s honour?

Gareth Brisbane took to social media on Tuesday night to reveal the news of her death.

“In her final moments, when I thought cancer had taken away her ability to speak, she ushered me closer and whispered a message for Maddie and me that will sustain me for the rest of my life,” he wrote in a post on Instagram.

“It took all of her remaining strength, and that gesture summed up our wee Melsie perfectly. Even then, her only thought was for Maddie and me.”

Her Instagram posts were flooded with messages of condolences, including from fellow MAFS judge John Aiken, who wrote: “Dearest Mel, this news is simply devastating. All of me is standing with you. Whenever you need me, please know I’m there”.

Other tributes came from former MAFS contestant Lucinda Slight, who recalled, “A precious memory of bumping into the radiant Mel on The Morning Show in the UK”, and UK-based Australian comedian Adam Hills, who said: “Mel was amazing, she spoke to everyone, on and off camera, and offered comfort”.

The post said: “Mel had mentioned she was undergoing cancer treatment and that it made her brain a bit fuzzy, but she never faltered.

“We exchanged numbers and promised to catch up for an Aussie chat. We didn’t.

“When she shared that things had worsened a few weeks ago, I meant to reach out but I didn’t. I never imagined she’d be gone so soon.”

Author Elizabeth Day, co-host of the How To Date podcast with Schilling, also paid tribute, writing: “I never understood the phrase she lights up a room until I met Mel.

“She wanted others to shine, to be special and feel loved.”

– Published by EveningReport.nz and AsiaPacificReport.nz, see: MIL OSI in partnership with Radio New Zealand

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